So you’ve decided to put yourself out there. You sign up for an account with match.com – it’s one of the first and arguably the most popular dating sites, so why not? But after you get your account, you immediately hit a road block. What on earth do you say about yourself? If you’re new to online dating, you might not know where to start. Or maybe you’ve already got an established presence on the site, but you’re not getting the winks and emails you thought you would and you want to know if there’s something you can change. The secret to being successful on match.com is figuring out how to make the site work for you. You’re part of the largest and most varied dating pool on the internet, which is a great thing, but it also means you have to work harder to stand out.
1. Change Your Headline
Finding the right headline for your profile can be hard, but the first thing to try if you want to spice things up a little is to change the way you advertise yourself. Say something original – don’t say something generic that tells the person who’s reading it nothing about you and ruins your chance of being special. “Young, single female looking for a healthy relationship” doesn’t cut it, at least not if you’re looking for a seriously great match. Read what everyone else is putting and choose something different. Try to be witty instead of cheesy, as well as highlighting one or two things about you that make you unique. It’s a tall order for just a small handful of words, but if you can master the headline? You’re already ahead of the game.
2. Change Your Photos
Not that your photos are necessarily bad, just practice rotating them and uploading new ones when you can. Not only will people notice, you might spark the interest of different people depending on which photo you use. Be smart about what you post, too. If you’re posting pictures of yourself half-clothed and showing off your body, you might be less likely to attract people interested in finding their soulmate – this goes for men as well as women. And if you have concerns about your size, post a full-body picture right off the bat. That way, you won’t get messages from people who will judge you later. It’s depressing how shallow people can be, but it’s always better to be honest with how you look while looking your best at the same time.
3. Improve What You Say – And How You Say It
You should not only pay attention to the things you say in your profile, you should also be able to recognize the tone. A general rule of life is people are attracted to positivity, no matter what the subject. Your profile is not a place to air your life’s woes, whether about relationships or anything else. Focus on the the things in life that make you happy and show off the attractive side of your personality. A good profile should be charming and fun, not serious and standoffish. And one mistake that many people make is giving off the impression that they only want to meet a very select group of people. If you come off as accepting and open, you will cast a much wider net.
4. Avoid Common Pitfalls
The biggest pitfall is creating a person you think people will want instead of advertising the person you are. Not being truthful can ruin your match.com experience. After all, what if you meet the person you want to marry and you’ve lied to them? Another big thing to avoid is being too scary. Don’t tell people how many kids you want to have and how you absolutely must get married by a certain age and don’t advertise your sexual prowess or anything like that – it really isn’t charming.
5. Avoid Cliches
You might genuinely like long walks on the beach, but you should probably find a different way to talk about it. Online dating is full of cliches – people looking for their prince charming or princess, and all kinds of cringe-inducing talk about chemistry and finding your “partner in crime.” The definition of a cliche is a phrase that’s been used so many times that it has lost all meaning. So if you have phrases in your profile that you’ve heard a million times before, delete them. Then focus on the meaning behind what you’re trying to say and say it your own way.
There’s a reason match.com is so popular with people looking for love online, and that is because it’s worked. Online dating is filled with obstacles, and it can be awkward and frustrating if you’re not happy with the results. But if you focus on presenting yourself the best way possible in your profile, you’re more likely to be one of the lucky ones who gets to take it down someday.
– Damon Lampton writes for Cupid’s library, where you can get informed on the most recent trends in online dating. Click here to read the most recent match.com review.
